I've been dealing with a lot of problems as of late. Trying to get back into my routine. Trying to be healthier, Trying to be a better Marine. It's been really hard lately. I've lost all my focus for everything I ever wanted. It really bothers me that I've allowed myself to lose touch with everything this much. I've really screwed myself over.

I entered a race called the Muddy Buddy. I've let myself go so much I know I won't be in the best shape for it when it comes around. I can get to a point where I know I'll finish but I'm really worried about this summer. I'm going to Bridgeport for AT this summer and it's all about Mountain Warfare training. I'm slightly concerned about it.

I've let myself go. My priorities are all mixed up.

I'm tired of all the bullshit. I'm tired of being unsure of myself, and I'm tired of not being able to stayed focused enough to achieve the goals I want. I get so close, and then I let one thing get me down and I end up taking 30 steps back instead of one.